May 13, 2015 by Jeff Lowen
There was a man from Nantucket. He decided to leave after he hurt a few people in his wake. Instead of taking responsibility for his actions, he chose to play the victim and point his finger at everyone else for his plight. “Of course, it’s not my fault…” he would say.
Do you know someone like this? If you don’t… It’s probably you! How often do things happen in our lives that lend themselves to a less than optimum result? Some more than others, I’m sure, yet life’s bowl of cherries will eventually become a bowl of pits if we don’t continue to fill it with ripe, sweet and tasty specimens.
One of my metaphorical avenues I’ve laid claim to, is pointing my finger at the person in my life at any given time for all the junk that’s happened to me.
When I’m standing in front of a mirror, of course!
Alas, it wasn’t until I understood and believed – that everything in my life is my fault. The good, the bad and the ugly. If you follow the good book*, then you know that we’re all give the freedom of choice. And although God may impart mercy on the irresponsible, there are often arduous and uncomfortable consequences. When a choice comes your way – which is every second of the day – choose wisely. It helps to have a set of written values that you follow so your decisions aren’t arbitrary and without cause. This breeds the irresponsibility part, and you’ll soon find yourself having jumped out of that airplane without a parachute. All you can say is,”Just hold on… It’ll all be over soon.”
Back to our man from Nantucket. He got a new start, new town, new friends and new experiences. A little secret though – He left everything behind, except himself. Often change is great, and provides a beautiful illusion. Often nothing more than a band-aid bridging the gap between who we are and who we think we are.
So write yourself a set of values. You have them. You live them. Even if you haven’t written them down. Here’s an exercise from MIND TOOLS to help. You’ll be surprised what this does for you.
*My references do not promote, condone or support any particular religious views, nor any specific dogma. And although my thoughts are available upon request, the only thing I’m promoting here is to be a better person – whatever that means to you. If this helps, awesome. An ideal for which I am well pleased.